Splintered Reflections

Today has been a BAD DAY.  To explain further…

Frustrated tweets by @janeprinsep today have included:

• Too tired for 10 am. Coffee shortage. About to ration it out in manner of South American rugby team on mountain with wine/chocolate.
• Not enough hours in the day. Keep hitting Wall of Exhaustion round about now, mixed with sinking feeling that I haven’t achieved enough.
• Several people are waiting for several things from me. On top of kids wanting me ALL the time. I sound depressed, don’t I?!
• Need a holiday. Need distance. Neeeeeeeedddddy meeeeeeeee!!!!
• That was a Desperate Hysterical Broadcast brought to you by the Completely Shattered Party…

Another writer friend of mine on Twitter @katheastman, kindly suggested a walk around the lake.  This would normally be my usual “tonic of choice”, however, as I find myself house-bound once more, whilst The Utility voluntarily subtracts a few more years from his life at ice hockey, this isn’t an option.

Therefore, my evening has so far been spent swimming around in Frustration Soup and pondering on how to lessen the “mental load”.

Searching around for answers, I repeatedly stumble across a reoccurring theme.  The most irritating aspect of Motherhood and looking after children full-time is that I cannot do anything well.  Everything gets interrupted, NOTHING gets finished.  I seem unable to draw a line under anything.  I live my life in staccato.

What IS it that I want?  What do I need?  Other than a holiday, some space for me, a few thousand quid etc, I could just do with a bit more time…

Tick-tock, tick-tock…

Some time, and a couple of triple espressos, later…

I finally FINISHED something; my poem entitled Pagophobia!  I am feeling a sense of something I rarely get to feel these days.  Achievement!

To give you a bit of background…*falls asleep mid-sentence*

x